Oral Character Structure

We are all mixtures of all of the structures.  But sometimes some of the structures are more powerful than others.  This is a description of the pure oral structure, but a pure oral structure is very unusual.  If this is your dominant structure, then you may recognise some of the characteristics, but probably not all, as they will be mixed with other character structures.

How the Oral Structure is Formed

This structure can be formed during the first two years of a baby’s life.  It is formed when the baby experiences abandonment.  Abandonment means that some of the needs of baby are not met.  Usually these will be the emotional needs that are not fully fulfilled.  Abandonment is different from rejection.  The baby is accepted, but not all of its needs are fulfilled.  And so, it has the right to exist, but feels as though something is missing.

A separation is created between needs and independence.  If one is independent, then ones needs are not met.  If ones needs are being met, then one cannot be independent.

The structure is called Oral because it happens during the oral phase of the development and it often leaves marks in the form of oral fixations (food, smoking, talking, etc).

Physically the body stays in a position of asking, with the head in front of the body, the mouth and lips attempting to get some nourishment, and the armes stretched out in front, asking to be held.  Nearsightedness often arises.  The body becomes more limp and the energy flow through it is weak.  The muscles are soft.  Tensions in the neck and shoulders arise, due to the positioning of the head and shoulders.  Often the person we be taller than expected.

But the body is not fully energised.  It becomes a little frail, a bit ghost-like.

What Dynamics Can Occur in the Oral Structure

The oral structure will often lead to feelings of emptiness.  The emptiness, lack, will often be felt in the chest as a black hole.  Something is always missing, and it seems that nothing can fill this void.

The person may have a tendency of experiencing bouts of depression and periods of elation.

Often the person will develop good oral skills, and will enjoy talking.  They will have a tendency of not being direct, but instead finding roundabout ways of asking for things.  So, instead of saying “I am hungry, let’s grab a bite to eat” they might start with a question “Aren’t you hungry?”, wishing for the other person to guess that they in fact want to eat.

A person with the oral structure will want to be around others.  They do not like to be left alone.  They will feel best when they are with others.  If you can provide good company, and something scrumptious to eat, while telling them how special they are, they will feel very good.  But they will always tend to want more, because the hole in their chest will never really be filled.

This is where the irony of the defence structure comes in.  The structure is supposedly set up to protect from lack.  But the indirect manner of asking, and always wanting more, can sometimes be interpreted as manipulative extortion and can therefore cause others to distance themselves from the oral person.  Even if the other person does not fully analyse the situation, they will still feel uncomfortable and want to distance themselves.

How to Work to Overcome its Challenges

Physically one would work on grounding, making sure the person feels a connection to the ground, and can stand firmly on their own two feet.  One would also work on allowing the energy to flow through the whole body, energising it.  Work would be done on opening the chest.  This is something bioenergetic therapists do.

Emotionally one can work on unifying the two extreme poles of “Needs” and “Independence”.  This too is done in therapy.  One of the ways to work on it alone is through affirmations.

Affirmations for the Oral Structure:

I am loved abundantly.

I feel fulfilled and satisfied.

I feel complete and free.

How to Use the Affirmations:

Say one of the affirmations and note how it feels in your body.  Most likely you will feel a contraction of a sort, indicating that this is not true.  The idea is to work with the affirmations until you feel that you have aligned yourself internally with them.  You will know that this has happened when say the affirmation and you feel a positive, open, expansive feeling in your body.

You can work the affirmations in a gradual manner.  If you feel that you are not loved abundantly, you can start asking yourself:  “What might it feel like if I were to feel that I am loved abundantly?”.  Then you focus on that feeling, expand it, get used to it, and practice it.

Soon there will be links to audio recordings with guided meditations focused on bringing the two poles “Needs” and “Independance” closer together.  They generate a binural beat of a Theta frequency in the mind, so that it will become easier to absorb the message.

The package that is designed to assist the oral structure is called “Loved”.

 

The Other Character Structures: